Another day at work, another day off.
Been sick the last several days and now I'm starting to feel a little more like myself. I really want to get some things out of my house and declutter my life. I want that clean feeling back. I want to know where things are and spend the time making my space the way I want it...practical, clean, appealing. This will not be easy given that I have to begin with floors and furniture. In time. Time is funny. Well, it is only Spring.

I'll Make It Clear

I am all that.

I got what you want.

Don’t care about your prospects or no money, babe.

Reach out cuz I want to.

I use this to make the riches in me overflow.

And got everything I want.

What you see is what you get.

So get over yourself, it’s not only you.

Not interested in money.

Want growth.

Got to get out of here.

This haze is lookin like mud.

"Time after time" is comin to mind.

Really.

Can it be?

Can it be?

Will you know when it gets a hold of you?

Will it hit you too?

One day. When you’re climbing your way up?

Fighting your way through your life fight?

Or in your prime?

Every time it is a sucker punch to the gut.

Every time it has blind sided me.

No one is exempt.  It seems to affect everyone.

Either you have it, or someone you know has it.

I am not alone.

I am not afraid.

I am empowered to be more

Do more

Live more

Laugh more

Cuz I want to

Cuz I don’t want to die

Cuz I want to be right

Cuz I got to try…

And see that it’s not all that bad

It’s not just these words

It’s my life

Can’t get over the wall if I don't keep climbing.

I cant’ believe I’ve come this far.

But eyes straight ahead, I can’t look back now.

Gotta let ‘em go, it's what they’d  want anyhow!

Don't want it to bite me when I’m payin attention

To the "all important" ascension.

So yeah I get mad and sad and reminisce at times.

I tell their stories 

So just let me live,

Let me climb

Let me be.  Let it stay at bay!

So I can make my mark.

Fuck Cancer!

Are Jee and son of my one beat?

Right or left? I don't get why you won't let me be, won't let me be.
Get out! I climb up and you push me down.
And Screw you!
Now, where is the logic in this?  I want to smile!
Dude, I have done my time. I've eaten my limes and
Even swallowed the frappin seeds.
Right or left? Come on now? Does it have to be the whole world? Why not me?
One time in life! Why not me?!
No pride dares to enter here, it blocks the rain
From washing me clean.
Rain on me. Rain on me.
Try it and see.  It isn't that hard.
Just go! I hate that you won't let me be.
I can't forget, I want to though.
I really want to.
Just let me be.

The drums and the guitar.
The bass and the keyboard.
The voice, the laugh.
I laugh.

The thought of another day with, makes me want out.
I just can't escape you.  Damn eyes and beat.
Alive, life.
That beat's just not for me.
That beat's just not for me.
It is for the world. The mission, I know.
But my beat can't escape, not with you.
Strumming on, I feel it though.
Is it another project, gadget or art again?
What is it now?
In the end it doesn't matter.
Calling my name, the same.
Calling my name...the same.
My beat, you are the death of me!
My beat, you leave so fast.
My beat, you've breathed your last.
Your last is this time...this time.
You've lost, you've lost.
So let me be, let me be.

Rain

The undertones of struggle in this piece signify for me, the death of hate and fear.

Rain

Rain again

Let it rain

I got it

It can rain and I’ll be ok

I know what you said and I get it.

This is what I choose.

Because I will not lose

Sight of my path of seeds,

Laying in the thick of the reeds.

6 o clock again and again, again and again

Hole in my wrist in the den.

I keep it safe from the likes of you,

The coffee is a battery

The likes of you

Just smashes me.

I can’t believe that all I have is good enough

All I’ve been told and sold was that sure, yeah I’ll call your bluff

It’s about to get rough

I’ll sell your shirt off your back

It’s so tough

Rain

Rain again

Let it rain

I got it

It can rain and I’ll be ok

I know what you said and I get it.

This is what I choose.

Because I will not lose

Sight of my path of seeds,

Laying in the thick of the reeds.

6 o clock again and again, again and again

Out there it’s not all you can say

Or about seize the day

Somebody help me get off this hay

Cuz I can’t find the needle I sat on

It’s just not worth lunging the revenge upon

You.  I just want to live on, the best

Me I can be.  But it’s like I can’t sit, stand,

I just gotta interrupt.

Run it over, then scrape it up

Yeah, yeah. Ha! That’s me in a cup

Rain

Rain again

Let it rain

I got it

It can rain and I’ll be ok

I know what you said and I get it.

This is what I choose.

Because I will not lose

Sight of my path of seeds,

Laying in the thick of the reeds.

6 o clock again and again, again and again

I sit paralyzed without a word to say

You think I don’t bleed? Well I do!

I am not gonna live on like this in my crew.

I just show you not a whisper of ill intent

Letting you sit there and lament

In all you’ve done.

Does it make you feel

Better now that you’re shunned?

Shunned out of this area

It’s like a net around you

Protecting you from Malaria.

I ain’t scared of ya.

What? What?!

Rain

Rain again

Let it rain

I got it

It can rain and I’ll be ok

I know what you said and I get it.

This is what I choose.

Because I will not lose

Sight of my path of seeds,

Laying in the thick of the reeds.

6 o clock again and again, again and again

Mental Health

More died at the hand of a mentally unstable man.  Maybe if money entered the talk? How many billions of dollars could we save in extra security measures, hassles and fallout effects on families if mental health is addressed? How would someone be left dangling with mental illness if we had preventative mental health measures in place, ESPECIALLY for military personnel? Come on CNN, maybe Alexis had a mental health issue? Is the issue really military contractor access? Really?  What was going on with him before he was granted access?  It is not a question of the military contractors having free range access! Stalling and not addressing the issue.  The real issue is mental health!  Why not address mental health?? Preventative measures now (even though we don't realize the apparent success when there is an absence of shootings) goes a long way in securing the safety of people, not contractor access for the Navy yard.  That is all that will be addressed is access?  Same can be applied to the Fort Hood shootings.  I get that reacting to fix something we can see might look better, but is it? Root cause, root cause.
http://www.cnn.com/2013/09/17/us/navy-yard-shooting-military-contractors/index.html?hpt=hp_t1

Edit

Edit, please edit.  Stress to yourself to edit because it apparently can bite you really hard.  No matter what you intend, the person who reads it may not get that intention.  It hurts and sucks and apparently this life is a communications class.  Well, the effort is here.  A big, fat sincere sorry for any ill intentions received.  There are none to you.  I hope there weren't any ill effects that came your way.  Still to everyone else please...edit.  

Thank you Man

So I was driving down the road and stopped at a red light.  I heard a honk and looked over to my left.  I saw tinted windows and an outline of a mans head.  The back window went down.  Out from his car came, "Hey Gorgeous."  I waved with my left hand and out bounced a perplexed, "Hi."  He looked shocked and said, "oh, I didn't see your ring at first, sorry."  His sincere apology showed true character. Thank you for putting a smile on my face.  Happy to know that I am still attractive enough to get that kind of greeting. :0)

Simple Moment

Walking along the bank, the rustling of leaves and twigs stop.

She stops to pat the water with her small palm.

The cool breeze off the water collides with her face and she inhales with a jolted smile.

Evermore, the joy.
Evermore, enjoying the simple moments.
In an instant, gone.
The girl reaches up for her mother’s hand.

They continue on their way and leave the bank once more.

Below the Surface

Get me out of here. I wanna take a ride


Far away in a warmer place in time.


So cold here, just aching to see


what I can't fathom. HA, it's gotten hold of me.





Spots of silver, shaking through it all.


Moving along with little care in mind.


Come on by. Believe me- you can.


It is all here just buried deep before you ran.





So bring your red shovel and put me at ease.


Guide me to contagious laughs in pen.


I give so much more in return.


The fire blazes free, in the midst of the burn.

Here

So I have been told that I have an active imagination and should write a romance novel. Mmmm, I might one day. For now, I will settle for the inspiration that the short story and verse offer. Cheers!

Think of me.
Think you know me.
Can’t we just be here without anything to do?
Without anything to say?
We can be here, be here, be here…..
I don’t wanna think you aren’t who I presume you are.
I wanna believe you are who I think you are….
You will be mine today, and I don’t care about tomorrow.
I seek the thrill of you, feel of you, look of you, here…..
Sitting on the brink of absolutely nothing at all….
So just be here in this space, be here, be here…..
No fights, no words, no ill conceived notions of the day, come away…..
I am here, I am here, be here….
I am here….

Going Anyway

Monkey on the free fall
Don’t know where he goes.
Loving is the time of day
I always want to grow.

Make her, take her
Carry her away.
Love her, lead her
Say goodbye someday.

Beautiful Noise

Running frightened from the spot light, it tangles in the web of the spider where its shell rests. The abyss isn't far. The beautiful chimes look peaceful and sound grand as they sound off. 
The aphids are no more when the wasp harbors near.
The bird flies away at the sight of a dog.
The bird doesn't peck the wasp.
The chimes ring again.
Oh, the high tones.
Oh, the low tones.
All together.
The wind blows.
They sound again.
And again.
And again.
It penetrates nerves from the inside and ruptures them.
Oh, how will you cease your sound? Can you not stop and love the quiet? Once more just quiet! Resting on the stone is a rose to cry a tear. The wind blows and silence triumphs.

Litera... what?

Playing with an idea presented to me through literature:

Not here for you.
The graceful words come from your mouth and take me to another place.

I heard on the radio that a certain famous figure is just plain despicable because he doesn’t deal with controversy well and is acting like a child about it.
What would make you judge so quickly?

Getting something you don't want
And then taking something else to, in effect make the first thing go away...
Doesn't work.  It's not an infection.

Saying where you got your coat just solidifies to you and everyone else that you got it and now, where you got it.
Clothes hide, clothes reveal. Can it really be that simple?
Ha, Saying that clothes drape our body to solely protect it is quite an illusive, incomplete statement.
It is out there now and you know it!
Its interminable hold on your state will release you one day. It is alright and you are alright, really.
Really you are!
We all have clothes.

Judgements are harsh from those who don't know and I know.
Life is as complex as we make it.

Goats eat grass and give our world so much more in return. Meh heh heh heh.

Clouds form above my head. A dark day and then, the rain washes away my tears... and I climb again.

Held in the Wings of a Dragonfly

Warm breeze through the air
Holds me in a soothing daze
Buzz of dragonflies
Zooming past my darting eyes
Calls my return and I rise.

Behold, now I state
Now is quite precious indeed
Embrace every chance
To raise your great, shining lance
And improve your circumstance.

Shiny Rings

Looking up with a smile.
The shiny rings in the sky fall heavy on the dewy ground.
There lurks about this ache inside.
Compels something more from the heart.
Give, love, share...
Share in nouns, verbs, prepositions...especially prepositions.
I presuppose a certain position in this world and turn it upside down for you to see everything in pocket.
Over!
Under!
Through this page!
Na! You wouldn't look, I know.
It's all about the shiny coat and easy, breezy time.

I ache to give those rings back.
They are shiny.
They are blinding.
They make it so hard to see the face - in front of me.
You wonder why I turn around,
Dart my eyes
And turn in circles?
Well, those damn rings are detracting from the beauty that IS you.

A Guided Heart

Bits and pieces, I'm on my way.

Right this way, feeling fine.

Keep following your heart.



Bits and pieces, I've gone astray.

Not this way, change my stride.

Follow my heart, go back again.


Bits and pieces, it's all a mess now.

You'll be alright...walk away.

Follow your heart, to me.

A Pretty Picture of Words

Imagining consistency
And ladling joy
Giving it my all for you to just turn away

Thick-headed, stubborn
Heavy heart
Who the hell are you to say I'm insincere?

ha! not knowing is easier, less confusing
I get what you are doing, just go!
I guess it has nothing to with a growing heart or mind.

It's a race to be half good at everything? Buried in day to day? You say you aren't in a box?
Distant, spread apart, talking about the weather? Sticking to subjects on the surface so as not to offend Time....I mean, me?

This is not movement or growth or life. This is death. A death of the spirit.
Dig deeper, ask me. I will tell you the truth. This isn't your neck sticking out. Come on!

Wake up! You want to know more, look and you will see. You can't believe that everything you hear is just what they say it is...Words aren't always what they seem. Games, yep. Lots of them. There is more to this. There are agenda's-not only in the first person, schemes, wiggling into a life and back out again...

Is it too late to scream??

CHOCOLATE

So what! Yes, chocolate is one of my passions. Yep! It is bad. If chocolate isn't in the house, there is always cocoa powder. I can whip up a batch of brownies in no time or maybe some frosting. Ooooohhh, don't get me started on frosting. Here is a babbling on chocolate:

Chocolate is the issue tonight.
I eat all of it in sight!
The problem you see
Is that it consumes Me!
And I don't dare to put up a fight.

(Sigh)

Guess I'll stop after fifty pounds
And a few dental crowns.
Yes! Life without chocolate will be horrible!
The thought of it, simply deplorable!
To never have chocolate around.

By giving in, I aid in assistance.
And lessen the chocolate resistance.
I really thought I could manage.
But clearly, It has the advantage.
Oh, this unearthly chocolate-eating persistence!

(woe is me)

Guitar

Guitar


Sleek, light, hollow

Gripping, strumming, hearing

Enjoying sounds I call my own

Music